© itshazza

You want to say Hi to the cute girl on the subway. How will she react? Fortunately, I can tell you with some certainty, because she’s already sending messages to you. Looking out the window, reading a book, working on a computer, arms folded across chest, body away from you = do not disturb. So, y’know, don’t disturb her. Really. Even to say that you like her hair, shoes, or book. A compliment is not always a reason for women to smile and say thank you. You are a threat, remember? You are Schrödinger’s Rapist. Don’t assume that whatever you have to say will win her over with charm or flattery. Believe what she’s signaling, and back off.

If you speak, and she responds in a monosyllabic way without looking at you, she’s saying, “I don’t want to be rude, but please leave me alone.” You don’t know why. It could be “Please leave me alone because I am trying to memorize Beowulf.” It could be “Please leave me alone because you are a scary, scary man with breath like a water buffalo.” It could be “Please leave me alone because I am planning my assassination of a major geopolitical figure and I will have to kill you if you are able to recognize me and blow my cover.”

On the other hand, if she is turned towards you, making eye contact, and she responds in a friendly and talkative manner when you speak to her, you are getting a green light. You can continue the conversation until you start getting signals to back off.

The fourth point: If you fail to respect what women say, you label yourself a problem.

There’s a man with whom I went out on a single date—afternoon coffee, for one hour by the clock—on July 25th. In the two days after the date, he sent me about fifteen e-mails, scolding me for non-responsiveness. I e-mailed him back, saying, “Look, this is a disproportionate response to a single date. You are making me uncomfortable. Do not contact me again.” It is now October 7th. Does he still e-mail?

Yeah. He does. About every two weeks.

This man scores higher on the threat level scale than Man with the Cockroach Tattoos. (Who, after all, is guilty of nothing more than terrifying bad taste.) You see, Mr. E-mail has made it clear that he ignores what I say when he wants something from me. Now, I don’t know if he is an actual rapist, and I sincerely hope he’s not. But he is certainly Schrödinger’s Rapist, and this particular Schrödinger’s Rapist has a probability ratio greater than one in sixty. Because a man who ignores a woman’s NO in a non-sexual setting is more likely to ignore NO in a sexual setting, as well.

So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone. If you pursue a conversation when she’s tried to cut it off, you send a message. It is that your desire to speak trumps her right to be left alone. And each of those messages indicates that you believe your desires are a legitimate reason to override her rights.

For women, who are watching you very closely to determine how much of a threat you are, this is an important piece of data.

an excerpt from Phaedra Starling’s “Schrödinger’s Rapist: or a guy’s guide to approaching strange women without being maced” (via lostgrrrls)

HOLY FUCK THE TRUTH.

Can every one of my male followers read this? And please, before you get defensive (“I would never rape anyone!”) keep in mind, women being afraid of Shrodinger’s Rapists (oh my god i still can’t get over the encompassing brilliance of this phrase) is a conditioned, learned response from being immersed in rape culture and the evolution of sexism and sexual violence in our society from the day we’re born. And unfortunately, it’s very difficult to unlearn without the efforts of all genders to dismantle it. Which is where you come in.

(via lil-ith)

It’s also just rude and disrespectful to patently ignore what someone has told you regarding their personal space, body, and time. Get a clue.

(via geekdomme)

I will always reblog this. Always.

(via myherocomplex)

So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone.

(via alamaris)

shared 49 minutes ago via marymorstran · © lostgrrrls with 112155 NOTES
         x important       

Hanni the self-actualized cannibal.

shared 1 hour ago via klannibal · © mcavoyings with 497 NOTES
         x i snorted       x Hannibal Lecter       x Hannibal       

some nice interior/exterior shots from 3x3

shared 17 hours ago via anothermindpalace · © sherlockholmse with 834 NOTES
         x Sherlock       x Sherlock misc       

Colours meme: Gray for Sorrow
(Gray is the true neutral color. Its energy imparts void, emptiness, lack of movement, emotion, warmth and identifying characteristics. Because of this, gray can be restful, but it does not stimulate, energize, rejuvenate or excite. Too much of the color gray creates sadness and depression and a tendency to loneliness. It is also the color of isolation.)

Colours meme: Gray for Sorrow

(Gray is the true neutral color. Its energy imparts void, emptiness, lack of movement, emotion, warmth and identifying characteristics. Because of this, gray can be restful, but it does not stimulate, energize, rejuvenate or excite. Too much of the color gray creates sadness and depression and a tendency to loneliness. It is also the color of isolation.)

shared 17 hours ago via methingbad · © estherlune with 2675 NOTES
         x Sherlock       x SH       x S3       
marymorstran:

I do not have an airline. I have one jet. You cannot put one jet in a line.

marymorstran:

I do not have an airline. 
I have one jet.
You cannot put one jet in a line.
shared 17 hours ago via marymorstran with 175 NOTES
         x Cabin Pressure       

mykingdomscome:

He wanted to be a pirate

shared 17 hours ago via sergeantbarns · © mykingdomscome with 1033 NOTES
         x bb       x Sherlock       x SH       
shared 17 hours ago via cumberbatchhh · © sir-mycroft with 953 NOTES
         x Sherlock       x aww       x SH       x charles augustus magnussen       

awkwardsituationist:

two lionesses and their cubs taking an early morning stroll in kenya’s masai mara. photos by david lazar

shared 17 hours ago via branwyn-says · © awkwardsituationist with 5243 NOTES
         x lions       x big cats       

Title: Taking a Stand
Artist: Henry Jackman
Played: 834 times
shared 17 hours ago via thenerdnamedkelly · © taaauuuriiieeel with 109 NOTES
         x music       x the winter soldier       

rivailleackerman:

Make Me Choose II lets-be-psychostogether asked:
↳ Gendry or Arya + needle

shared 1 day ago via vvargs · © rivailleackerman with 602 NOTES
         x Game of Thrones       x Arya Stark